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第100章 饭桌趣事(1 / 2)

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书接上回。

王大撇子见着山把头,心想着拉个屎都不让舒坦,非得干你一下!

站起身子提溜起裤子就奔着山把头去了,可他忘了这裤腰带还在脖子上挂着。

(距后来知情人士透露,可能是王大撇子拉屎太臭,把人家熊瞎子从冬眠扒窝的洞里熏出来了......)

“俺这一奔这山把头去,这家伙也朝着俺扑了上来,可这没裤腰带绑着,裤子一掉把俺绊了个踉跄,正好躲过了山把头的致命一击。

再回头,俺也不惯着它,你来我往,见招拆招,俺借着这股寸劲儿,死命推了一把,结果俺和这山把头稀里咕噜顺着这山坡全滚了下来。

滚出来得有个几十米,俺跟着山把头就分开了,可这棉袄也让鼓捣了两下,裤子老卡脚,裤腰带也不知道去哪了,俺刚提起这裤子,山把头就冲过来了。

这家伙也可能蹲仓子蹲的没吃没喝的,跑起来也慢腾腾滴,俺一瞅这一没裤腰带,二没家伙事儿,今天暂且饶它一条狗命。

可这瘪犊子不识趣,上来就干俺,那俺能惯着它么?一个手也得跟它干!

为啥?另一个手提溜着裤子。

干了半天没干过,帽子也干掉了,让人家按的雪地里头了。

这山把头,咬人专咬脑瓜子,就这么一下子。

俺就感觉俺这头皮发麻!冰凉滴!

顺势俺一缩身子,跪在地上,把头埋进胸口,露着个后背,得亏冬天穿的厚啊。

这山把头边扒拉俺边嗷嗷叫,俺这一寻思今天不得交代了么?想想俺媳妇,俺闺女小子,尤其俺闺女,长那么水灵儿,俺是见不到她嫁人的那天咯!”

王大撇子说到这,边抹泪边瞅着张初一。

咳咳!

“姐夫,你能快点说么?这咋还哭上了!”

李富贵心里无语的要死,这王大撇子说话没溜,你就说砍柴火拉屎碰上了走驼子,让人家干了就完了,三两句的事儿还整出来这么多玩意!

“这山把头啃了俺约么着几分钟,这就不啃了,从俺身上下来,往山上那窝里走。

(几分钟....这是把山把头吃撑了!)

俺知道遇到这玩意就得装死!眯着眼睛看着山把头走远了,俺滋溜爬起来就跑。

这山把头一看俺跑嗖一下就追。

这边跑,俺就感觉这脸上眼睛睁不开,湿不拉几的直糊糊。

跑到俺家老牛跟前,把这缰绳一拽,俺就扒这爬犁上了。

那个喊呦!

老牛啊老牛你快跑啊!你不跑俺就没命了!快往家走!

俺家这牛也争气,咔咔的往屯子里跑,这山把头就在后面追,边追边嚎!

跑了能有三四里地,正好赶上咱屯子的李老栓也出来捡柴火,他就听见这西边有啥玩意嗷嗷的喊!

仔细一听这是山把头,然后就看见俺家老牛驮着爬犁跑出来了,后面果然跟着一个山把头,呼哧呼哧的在那追。

这李老栓拿着斧子嗷嗷喊!把山把头吓得不敢上前了,停下来站在远处呼呼的,这才转身离去,后来俺就啥也不知道了!

再醒来就在这炕头上了,多亏了老牛和李老栓了,媳妇啊!俺差点就见不着你了!”

说道这王大撇子又吧嗒吧嗒掉起眼泪嘞,李淑芬听完也知道今天自家爷们那也是九死一生,后怕不已。

两口子抱在一起哭个没完。

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