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第252章 夫妻互诉(2 / 2)

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“那我去宜州办事的时候?”靖安侯现在回想从前的诸多事情,原本没有多想的真相便慢慢浮出水面,他的神色有些悲哀,轻声道,“小幸,那一路上的偶遇是你安排出来的?目的就是让我记住你?”

陈幸慢慢地垂下眼眸,轻轻地咬住嘴唇,神情变幻不定,最后还是点点头,“对不起,姐姐那……我本不应该再拿出花灯的,可是我很怕再也见不到你,夫君,我不应该……”

当年,陈幸遇到周海明来宜州办事,心中还是再次悸动了,忍不住写信去大安询问靖安侯府的事情,从嫁到大安的好友陈庆回信中得知,赵玟儿三年前死了……

后来,陈幸便制造机会与周海明相遇,直到周海明马上要离开宜州了,陈幸索性穿上当年相遇的浅蓝色衣裙,手里提着一盏靖安侯忘不掉的花灯!

“不,应该是我跟你说声对不起才是!”这声“夫君”,顿时勾起了靖安侯无数的情绪,坚毅如他,眼眶也不自觉红了许多,愧疚地将身边人揽入怀中,真正话到嘴边,靖安侯才察觉到言语的苍白无力,苦笑道,“其实,说这些也没有用……暗自赌气那几年,你受了很多委屈,是我做不好一个夫君,不论是赵玟儿还是你,我都没有照顾好,我对不起你们!你们的委屈不是这轻飘飘的几句话就能够弥补挽回的……”

“造化弄人。”陈幸轻声道,“都过去了,是我没有照顾好你。”

如果是最初得知周海明连她和赵玟儿都分不清,或许还在怨恨周海明,但经历这么多事情,陈幸很清楚周海明的为人,至于孩子……也是被周老夫人和二房算计,如果说她心思简单愚钝,看不穿后宅妇人的阴谋手段,在嫁进来这么多年的时日,却还是没有一个当家主母应有的谋算,何况是向来耿直,不懂这些弯弯绕绕的周海明?岂能强求他将自己照顾的滴水不漏。

“造化……”靖安侯摇摇头,“还有宁儿和清儿,我也没有尽到做父亲的责任,宁儿失去生母后变得懂事有主见,常年游学在外不让我操心,每每来信都是报平安。至于报的血仇是清儿一手安排的,这些年来,我在府中时日不多,李雅萱掌府,清儿受了多大的辛酸磨难,十四岁的少女,却变成心思沉重的样子,看到她故意做些小女儿姿态来讨我欢心,我都难受……这些事都是清儿有意让我看到,若我能早些看清那些人,清儿就不会有顾忌,不敢在我面前直言谁是好人谁是坏人。只希望杜坡一行,能让她做回自己。”

他这一生,作为夫君,没能护住赵玟儿,让她香消玉殒,让陈幸受尽委屈……

作为父亲,也没能照顾好两个女儿……

其实,他只想要好好守护家人,为他们遮风挡雨,但到最后,却似乎都做错了……

“宁儿报喜不报忧,也是为了让你不要担心,她在外游学,你安排了足够多的人手护着她,每到一地你都会尽快安排,这份心意宁儿也知道。没有什么对错,若宁儿在府中免不了遇到和清儿一样的磨难,至于清儿也会慢慢明白的,会愿意相信你的,或许她觉得事情与你我之前认知不一样,不敢贸然说出。可我们要给她时间,相信以后有什么事,她不会再变着法子让我们知道,而是直接讲出来。我这个当娘的,也不是一下子就走到清儿心中的。”

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