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第四十七章 本心(1 / 2)

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一直沉默的系统此刻也忍不住开口提醒。

沐彦亳不在意的摇头,对系统打趣。

“少见啊,没想到你还会关心我……”

滴!

【系统并不关心你的安危,只是宿主你在拿自己的生命开玩笑,你的身体的血量即将降到了最低限度,再不接收治疗输血,会因失血过多而死。】

系统的话,让沐彦会心一笑,摇了摇头。

“你这还不是在担心我吗……”

【只是不理解你为什么要这么坚持,对一个素未貌面的陌生人值得你付出这些吗?】

”值得……呵呵,还记的我说的话吗?我很怕疼,很怕很怕疼,我一直认为我是个普通人,来到这里是因为那场梦,迷迷糊糊的来到这里想要变强……”

沐彦碎碎念念似的喃喃自语。

“我从小到大没受过什么苦,今天被划出口子的肉一直都在流血,今天我所受到的疼痛,比我从出生到现在,这一辈子加起来都要多!”

“我好几次都想放弃,脱离这个噩梦一般的位面世界,可每次脑海出现这种想法都会同时出现,‘再继续下去’这样的一句话……”

“一开始真的太累了也太苦了,想放弃,可却又发现自己不能放弃,我还有父母,我不能让梦中的未来发生,这让我感觉很不自在,像是一个身不由己的木偶……”

“直到我遇到了小凝,亲眼看到小凝遭遇危险,在那一瞬间,我完全是下意识的行动,当被锯齿切割肉体的那一瞬,我的心情很复杂,也许是后悔、释然、解脱……”

“我又一次差点死了,那种意识好似脱离肉体,脆弱的灵魂在无能的战栗……”

“总之,那之后我发现我能做的比想象的要多,我,救下了一个人!也许我是一个烂好人,我不只能保护我的家人,还能保护更多人……”

【就因为这个原因,因为想要保护别人,你才如此拼命?】

“不只是这些,可能不只是这些吧……”

“我从小性格就很奇怪,不光父母亲戚朋友觉的如此,我也觉的我性格有问题,喜欢自言自语,典型的表演型人格。”

沐彦神情有些迷茫,“我也很苦恼这些,我不明白我为什么会这样。”

正说着,沐彦的表情一变。

“而直到现在我明白了……”

沐彦的露出意味深长且森寒至极的笑容,这种可怕的笑容从未在沐彦脸上出现过,仿佛在一刹那换了一个人!

沐彦这份的笑容很快掩饰过去,重新变回了之前的腼腆与人畜无害。

“我可能是个不甘平凡的人吧,总是在给自己普通无聊的人生找些不一样的事做……”

“今天我可能找到了,这一场场的战斗很激烈,这一辈子我都没经历过这样的强者生,弱者死的生死相搏……”

沐彦露出似哭似笑的复杂表情,身体似乎在微微颤抖。

“真是让人感叹生死无常啊!我在之后惊愕的发现,我在每一次挥刀搏杀时都会热血沸腾,脑子出奇的转的很快,我好像在兴奋并享受这杀戮的感觉。”

滴!

【宿主,你的话语前后矛盾……】

可不是吗?前面说自己怕死,后面又说,对战斗感到兴奋。

沐彦耸了耸肩,“人本身就是矛盾的,我怕死又怕疼因为这我想放弃,同时可我又对战斗感到兴奋,就像人喜欢看恐怖电影一样,即是会恐惧害怕不想再看下去,却又忍不往好奇想要继续看去。”

【我不懂!】

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