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第145章 《破解女生不主动密码:三招俘获芳心秘籍》(1 / 2)

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女生从不主动联系你,该怎么办?

在情感的世界里,不少男生都遭遇过这样的困惑:心仪的女生,从不主动联系自己。你主动找她聊天,她虽会回应,但你若不开启话题,她就仿佛消失一般。好多男生被这种情况折磨得痛苦不堪,进一步没勇气,退一步又心有不甘。

这不,前几天我就收到一位粉丝的私信。这位兄弟满是无奈地倾诉,他和那女生相处都大半年了,平常聊天氛围看着也不错,自己抛出的话题,女生都会给予回应。可她就是从不主动,每次都得自己先开口,女生才会回复。他满心疑惑,忍不住问:“她这到底啥意思啊?是生性腼腆羞涩,还是压根就不喜欢我?”

首先,得先揭开一个残酷的真相。女生不主动,绝不是因为她不爱聊天、不玩手机,根本原因是她对你兴趣缺缺,觉得你和她理想中的男友形象存在差距,所以才不愿主动。不过,这“没兴趣”也分两种情况。一种是对你稍有好感,但你某些方面还没达到她的标准,于是女生抱着骑驴找马的心态考察你;另一种则是彻彻底底对你没感觉,横竖看你都不顺眼。要是遇到第二种情况,我建议兄弟们果断放手,别再白白耗费时间。

那怎样的表现意味着你还有戏呢?

其一,跟你互动时从不敷衍。聊天过程中,她会认真回答你的问题,绝非那种只用“嗯”“哦”等寥寥数字打发你的态度。比如你问她最近看了什么好看的电影,她会详细跟你分享电影的情节、自己的感受,而不是简单回一句“没看”。

其二,对于你的邀约,只要时间允许,她就会答应。女生答应你的邀约,意义非凡。一方面,表明她对你有一定信任,不担心你会心怀不轨;另一方面,说明她愿意与你亲近,踏出这一步,自然也就不排除进一步相处的可能。想象一下,你邀请她周末去公园散步,她欣然赴约,在漫步过程中,你们分享彼此的趣事,感情也在悄然升温。

其三,她会对你有一定程度的自我暴露。如果女生在你面前更愿意敞开心扉,深入谈及自己的事情,那就证明你们关系愈发亲密。比如你们的聊天能从表面的工作内容,深入到选择这份工作的缘由,以及对未来工作的规划。又或者她会跟你分享小时候的趣事、曾经的梦想,这些都是自我暴露的体现。要是以上三个条件女生都满足,即便她不主动,你也有机会俘获她的芳心;要是都不沾边,那还是尽早退场为好。

但兄弟们要清楚,就算判断出女生对你有好感,也不能再沿用以前的相处模式,必须做出改变,放大她对你的兴趣,不然那点好感很容易就消磨殆尽。至于怎么改变,我这儿有三条实用建议。

谋定而后动,结果前置

和喜欢的女生相处,不能因女生的互动冷淡就只想着活跃气氛,也不能因怕打扰她生活就轻易后撤,不能总是依据女生的反馈来决定自己的行动。否则,在这段关系里你永远没有主导权,始终被女生牵着鼻子走。正确做法是,先明确你期望与女生相处能得到怎样的反馈,再据此决定相处方式。

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