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第14章 徐娘半老苏夫人(1 / 2)

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场景布置得那叫一个“古色古香,热闹非凡”,两边各摆着一对巨无霸餐桌,上面还傲娇地坐着两把太师椅,仿佛在说:“坐上来,你就是这条街最靓的崽!”

参选的选手们被巧妙地分成了“务实派”和“文艺范儿”两大阵营,由两位穿着师爷服、表情却像极了喜剧演员的老哥在桌上飞快地记录着,仿佛是在玩“谁的名字最长谁就赢”的游戏。

正中央,一块牌子高高竖起,上书:“苏府小厮招募现场——梦想从这里启航,也可能是撞南墙的开始!”

叶青轩穿梭其间,眼神中带着几分好奇几分无奈,心里嘀咕:“这阵容,简直是小厮界的‘星光大道’啊,我这样的‘路人甲’会不会直接被淘汰到银河系外?”

只见人群中,真正的小厮候选人与那些心怀鬼胎、梦想着“曲线救国”的才子们五五开,人数之多,估计能绕苏府三圈还有余。

大家挤得跟早高峰的地铁似的,生怕晚一秒报名就错过了成为“古代版马云”的机会。

叶青轩挠挠头,心中暗叹:“这年头,连当个小厮都得过五关斩六将,真是应了那句老话——‘宇宙尽头是编制,古代亦是就业难’啊!”

他一边在心里把王老头骂了个“狗血淋头”,一边悠哉游哉地在人群中踱步,心想:“王大叔这招‘借刀杀人’玩得真溜,不过好在我不用排队,可以悠闲地当个吃瓜群众。”

应聘者中,愁眉苦脸的是主流,但那份焦虑与叶青轩那个时代的“求职难民”如出一辙,让人忍俊不禁。

而那些自诩风流倜傥的才子们,则是一副“我不属于这里,但我要让你们都知道”的高傲姿态,手里摇着扇子,仿佛在说:“别看我扇的是风,其实扇的是寂寞和才华。”

深秋的天气,寒风瑟瑟,这些才子们却还摇着扇子,叶青轩心想:“这是最新潮流?‘扇子保暖法’?还是说,他们觉得这样能增加文学气息,让诗句更有‘风’味?”

就在这时,一场即兴的“接龙诗大赛”悄然拉开序幕。只见一位才子手持折扇,一脸得意地走向另三位同样装备齐全的“文青”,

大笑道:“哟,张兄、汤兄、王兄,咱们这是组团来应聘小厮,还是来开诗会啊?”四人一番寒暄后,决定来个即兴接龙,比拼文采。

“既然如此,小弟不才,愿抛砖引玉!”那位发起人率先开口,其他三人摩拳擦掌,跃跃欲试。这场景,就像是古代版的“中国诗词大会”,只不过舞台换成了苏府的小厮招募现场,而观众则是那些一脸懵圈却又不失兴趣的应聘者们。

叶青轩在一旁看得津津有味,心想:“这哪是招小厮啊,简直是选拔‘古代文学新星’嘛!看来,这年头没点文化底蕴,连小厮都当不上了。”他暗自庆幸,自己虽然不会吟诗作对,但胜在心态好,毕竟,在这个充满幽默与意外的世界里,谁又知道最终的赢家会是谁呢?

“嘿,兄弟们,咱们得给这开场来个响亮的!”某位兄台(我们暂且称他为“文艺范小哥”),眉头紧锁,宛如思考宇宙终极问题,突然目光锁定地上落叶,眼睛一亮,故作深沉地摇头晃脑起来:“一去二三,三三得九——哎呀,不对不对,重来重来!‘一去二三里!”

“烟村四五家”王兄紧跟其后,一脸认真又带点小调皮。

“亭台六七座……”赵兄故意拖长音,引来一片笑声”

轮到李兄,他眼珠子一转,机智上线:“八九十只花”说完还故作高深地捋了捋不存在的胡子。

“妙哉,妙哉!此诗应天上有,人间难得几回闻!”四人相视一笑,默契十足地给自己鼓起了掌。

叶青轩在一旁看得目瞪口呆。

“苏夫人驾到,各位让让,让让!”一阵急促的呼喊声打破了宁静,人群瞬间沸腾。只见一群自诩文采飞扬的才子们,瞬间抛弃了风度,与平民百姓一同挤成了“人肉长城”。

“兄弟们,冲啊!谁先见到苏夫人,谁就是今晚的幸运儿!”文艺范小哥一声令下,率先冲锋陷阵。叶青轩见状,心中暗笑:“这哪是抢亲,简直是抢菜市场大白菜啊!”

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