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我的话超再次出了周沁的心理预期,她微微张开了嘴,黑框眼镜后面的眼睛不停地眨,她是个情绪控制能力极强的人,但是我还是从这一丝半点的细节中,窥探到了那份震惊。

“对不起,打扰了。”我苦笑着站起来看向那辛,“我们回去吧,让周老师好好休息。”

这是我第一次喊周沁“周老师”,这三个疏远的字眼也表明了我的决心。

那辛不可思议地看着我,接着“哦”了一声,随后转身去接洋洋。

小孩子的世界永远阳光明媚,路上洋洋问我们,下次什么时候再来周老师家里玩啊。那辛扭过头去让他不要乱说话,洋洋噘着嘴,又一脸委屈,是啊,孩子又做错了什么呢?

已近深夜,那辛的新房离我家有一个半小时的车程,而吴柯渝昨天去了重庆出差,那辛便邀我留下住一晚,省得来回折腾。

趁她催洋洋睡觉的空隙里,我一个人坐在沙发上闭着眼睛发呆,过了一会儿,她突然拍了拍我的肩膀:“睡着了?"

“没有,不困。”

“又骗我,你瞧瞧你,两个眼睛都睁不开了,还说不困。”她撇撇嘴,顺势坐到我旁边,“说说看,你现在怎么想的?”

“能怎么想?本来也没什么,现在既然他家里人讨厌我,就趁机断了呗。”我一脸苦笑。

"没什么?你们俩就差那一层窗户纸了,还说没什么?依我看,你别在意别人的看法,做自己就行,毕竟结婚后的日子,主要还是你们俩自己过。”

“我真没事,我不想给别人增加负担,更不想让别人为难。

“你总是这么为别人着想,什么时候才能为自己活一次啊!"那辛吐了口气,“我知道我也劝不动你,只保佑老天爷让你早点开窍。你想放手,他杨震还不一定肯放呢…”

“如果他明白和我在一起后,注定要承受家里巨大的不满,我想他会改变的。”

“那可不一定,依我看杨震这个人,表面上说起话来圆滑周到得很,实际上最有主见、最固执。”

我惊讶地看着她,心中更是波翻浪涌。那辛的说法我认同,但是感情的事情和日常生活、工作不同,很多人的性格到了感情中会产生完全相反的变化,有些骄傲的人会为爱变得卑微,有些勇敢的人也会因为各种压力变得懦弱,我没办法去赌杨震的所思所想,更没法判断他在感情中会不会产生变,残存的理智告诉我,我能做的,只有牢牢控制住自己的心。

那辛和我挤在客房里休息,月亮透过卧室白色的窗帘照在床头柜上,明朗又温柔。那辛微笑着捂着小腹,月色笼罩着她的眼角眉梢,那一刻我只觉得,此时的那辛褪去了女强人的光芒,褪去了风风火火的个性,她浑身上下被一种叫做母亲的光辉笼罩着,温柔而幸福。

我是多么羡慕她啊,能两次拥有自己的孩子,如果这次怀的是个女儿,她即将凑成一个“好”字。记得我刚毕业时与她因为合租相识,随后发展成了一辈子吵不走打不散的闺蜜,这真是一种奇妙的缘分;记得也是这么一个月光如水的晚上,我们俩喝了点小酒,脸颊红扑扑地倒在沙发上看月亮。聊起未来时,我说比起事业,我更看重家庭;而她却说自己很贪心,家庭和事业都要,家庭要美满幸福,事业上她也一定不要比男人差;我当时笑话她说,这根本不可能,律师和警察一样都是大忙人,每天能回家睡个觉都是奢望,怎么可能做到平衡。可她偏偏将嘴一撅,说她不信命,她一定要做到。

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