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第158章 沈清客回忆录(2 / 2)

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母亲望着他的脸,眼底带着病态的偏执:“真像啊……”

像?像什么?

少年冷眼看着女人:“像父亲吗?他也是这样厌嫌地看着您吗?”

女人听出他言语中的恶意,意外地没有发怒,“是厌嫌你啊,傻子。”

她疲倦地笑着,脸上那不知是泪还是酒的痕迹晕花了她艳丽的妆容,浮现出被隐藏的岁月:“我死以后,你又要怎么办呢?”

少年沈清客平静道:“我不会难过的,母亲。”

“那就更像了。”她依旧笑。

不久后,他的母亲真的快死了。

守在母亲的榻前,女人只问了他一句:“你等这一刻,等了很久吧?”

沈清客没有开口,静静看着母亲枯萎的面庞。

女人呼出一口气,平静地看着屋顶:“我不要你看着我咽气,我要看着你滚。”

沈清客一动不动站在榻前。

女人把头扭向他,眼中没有眷恋:“你滚吧,现在就滚。”

无论是病入膏肓的母亲,还是即将失去生母的少年,都异常冷静。临别之际,原来也没有什么想说的。

母亲看着少年的背影,一直没有闭上眼。

少年还是偷偷回来了。

彼时母亲已如过了花期的花朵,一片片凋零,艳丽的色泽褪去,留下一地残败。

沈清客盖住她的病容,留下一把火,带走这朵衰败的花,一滴泪也没剩。

真正离开的一刻,他心底有些怅然,静立了半晌,终于上路。

也许再没人知道,这深山里有一座宫殿,宫殿里住着一位疯魔的公主。

他不知道自己该去哪,从此也只有他一个人了,他去到哪,那便是家。

如果世间有缘分,那沿途中这个和善的女人向他招手算何种缘分?

她衣不染尘,高贵典雅,像一个下凡尘的仙人。只有沈清客看得到,她眼底有种病态,病态中带着疲惫,像无数次母亲温柔地望着他,抬手掐住他的脖颈时流露出的目光。

事实上他猜得没有错,逐云也确实是一个疯子,甚至只向他一个人发泄恶意。

她越厌恶自己,越能让自己想起母亲。原来,他还没有忘记母亲,没有忘记母亲的怨恨,母亲的厌嫌,母亲的疲惫……

原来,他会记得,母亲死时,他不曾难过,不曾流过一滴泪。他想,伤心是什么感觉?他会为了母亲的死而伤心吗?

修行时,他有想不通的问题,便生了心魔。

直至他最后手握权力,心魔还是被藏在心底,滋生出盘根错节。

再后来他遇到了今夕。

那个灾祸的容器,生于天灾人祸,本该死在地狱,却还祈求活着,弱小无力,只有生命由自己做主。

真像年少时的自己。

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