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第14章 猪八戒:猴哥的黑历史都曝光了,我的呢在线等,挺急的!(1 / 2)

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张东哼着小曲儿,心情那叫一个阳光灿烂。九转金丹的药效简直绝了,不仅让他直接从凡人晋升为炼气期一层,感觉浑身轻飘飘的,像是装了弹簧,就连脑袋都灵光了不少,思路那是蹭蹭蹭地往外冒。他甚至觉得,自己现在一口气能上五楼,不费劲儿!当然,最让他心花怒放的,还是万界声望值蹭蹭上涨的快感,以及解锁万界声望商店的成就感。

“嘿嘿,九转金丹换一个视频,这买卖,血赚!”张东美滋滋地想着,忍不住又点开万界搞笑宇宙APP,想看看还有没有哪个神仙大佬给他发私信。

果不其然,私信列表里又多了一条未读消息,发信人头像是一个猪头人身的家伙,油光锃亮的大耳朵格外醒目——【猪八戒】。

张东嘴角一抽,差点没把刚喝进嘴里的水喷出来。“我去,猪八戒?这货也来凑热闹了?”他带着几分好奇,几分戏谑地戳开了私信。

【猪八戒】:@狗哥超搞笑,狗哥,看了你做的猴哥和老君的视频,那是相当的精彩,相当的震撼啊!尤其是猴哥的,把我老猪当年在天庭偷吃仙丹,醉酒调戏嫦娥的事情都给勾起来了,唉,不堪回首,不堪回首啊!【捂脸】【捂脸】

“噗……”张东这回是真的没忍住,一口水喷了出来,直接喷了电脑屏幕上。他手忙脚乱地抽过纸巾擦拭着,一边擦一边忍不住笑得前仰后合。“哈哈哈哈,这猪八戒,上来就自曝黑历史?还‘不堪回首’?我看你是乐在其中吧!”

还没等他擦干净屏幕,猪八戒又发来一条消息,这次语气明显急切了不少。

【猪八戒】:@狗哥超搞笑,咳咳,狗哥啊,那个……猴哥的黑历史都曝光了,老君炸炉也火遍万界了,你看……你看啥时候安排安排我老猪啊?在线等,挺急的!【搓手】【搓手】【眼巴巴】

“卧槽!这猪头是认真的?!”张东彻底惊呆了,他原本以为猪八戒只是来凑个热闹,没想到这货居然是主动上门求“黑”来了?还“在线等,挺急的”?这画风,简直清奇!

他上下滑动着聊天记录,看着猪八戒那一连串的【搓手】【眼巴巴】的表情,越看越觉得好笑。“哈哈哈哈,猪八戒,你也有今天?主动要求被剪辑?你是嫌自己在万界宇宙还不够出名是吧?”

不过,转念一想,张东又觉得这事儿挺有意思的。孙悟空、太上老君都安排上了,西游天团怎么能少了猪八戒呢?而且,猪八戒的黑历史,那可比孙悟空和太上老君加起来都精彩啊!高老庄调戏翠兰,偷吃人参果,好吃懒做,贪财好色……随便拎出来一件,都能做成一部爆笑大片!

想到这里,张东的嘴角忍不住微微上扬,眼中闪过一丝狡黠的光芒。既然猪八戒主动送上门来,那自己就勉为其难地“安排安排”他吧!

他清了清嗓子,手指飞快地在键盘上敲击着,回复道:

【狗哥超搞笑】:@猪八戒,八戒元帅莫急,小的这就来安排!不过,您老人家的黑历史素材实在是……太多了,小的得好好整理整理,仔细研究研究,才能保证做出精品,让您满意,让万界众生都满意,您说是不是?【滑稽】【滑稽】

消息刚发出去,猪八戒立刻秒回,速度之快,简直堪比光速。

【猪八戒】:@狗哥超搞笑,那是那是!狗哥说的极是!一定要精品!一定要震撼!一定要让万界都记住我老猪的风采!【得意】【得意】对了对了,狗哥啊,你看……你看能不能先预定一个【高老庄背媳妇】的视频?那段故事,那可是我老猪的成名之战啊!必须安排上!【期待】【期待】【星星眼】

“噗……咳咳咳……”张东再次被猪八戒的回复给呛到了,这次直接被自己的口水给呛得直咳嗽。他一边咳嗽,一边哭笑不得地看着屏幕上的【高老庄背媳妇】几个字,感觉自己简直要被猪八戒给打败了。

“我去,这猪头是真不怕丢人啊!‘高老庄背媳妇’?那是你老猪的光辉事迹吗?那是你老猪的黑历史好不好?还‘成名之战’?你是想靠这个‘名扬万界’吗?”张东心中疯狂吐槽,但嘴角却忍不住勾起一丝玩味的笑容。

猪八戒主动要求自曝其短,这可真是太有意思了!看来,这万界神仙,一个个都是深藏不露的“喜剧人”啊!

他定了定神,回复道:

【狗哥超搞笑】:@猪八戒,八戒元帅真是性情中人!【高老庄背媳妇】这个主题,小的记下了!保证给您安排得明明白白,妥妥的!不过,在此之前,小的还得先做一些“前期准备工作”,您老人家稍安勿躁,敬请期待!【神秘】【神秘】

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