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第二百八十八章 对不起,谢谢你(1 / 2)

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不知不觉已是晚秋,正午到来之前世界都开始变得昏暗,偶尔刮起的冷风席卷着落叶,让人只是看了便浑身发抖。为了打印孙美玉安排下来的文件,承美忙得昏天黑地。将材料一一审核装订完,终于可以抽出时间缓口气了。

“李代理!”

煜诚停下脚步,认真的看着承美的眼睛,她的眼睛闪着光,这一瞬间比以往任何时候都要鲜活。

“对不起…谢谢你。”

承美闭了闭眼睛,就像在忍受着言语的鞭挞。半晌过去了,承美缓缓睁开眼睛,静静而又有些神情恍惚的站在那里。煜诚也微微张开干枯的嘴唇。

“谢什么?”

承美明知故问,她的脸上是煜诚从未见过的笃定表情。煜诚感觉自己的身体似乎被人用橡皮筋牢牢的绑在了原地。又过了好一会儿, 他才支支吾吾、语无伦次的回答。

“就是,就是很想谢谢你,你…你…”

煜诚说不下去了,转过身却并未离开。承美依然保持着微笑,尽管她的心做不到那么豁达。

“郑代理!”

承美的开口打破了令人窒息的沉默。煜诚慢慢转过身,直到现在煜诚看到承美,还是会惊讶,仿佛从前那个承美又回来了。他开始努力的在年轻美丽的承美身上,寻找昔日妻子的模样。不只是脸,眼神和表情也渐渐重叠。凝视着熟悉却陌生的脸,回忆着她不由自主的对自己大喊“滚!滚吧!”时自己的心情;即便两个人都有过错,可承美始终不肯向自己道歉时的样子;还有那以夫妻之名度过的无话可说的漫长岁月。但渐渐的,煜诚终于意识到自己也曾无数次的对妻子说过“滚蛋,去死吧。”的话语。“我说着自己以前从未说过的恶言恶语,我感受着那些冷处理带来的直抵心灵的暴击,一次又一次,我的视而不见、我的自私自利让承美的人生多么痛苦无助。”此刻,说过的话、做错的事,从承美那不接纳任何情愫的光滑面孔上弹了回来,狠狠的映射在煜诚的的眼睛里,煜诚慌了,他捂着额头,勉强倚靠着墙角站定下来。

如煜诚亲眼目睹的那样,承美一步一步的走到他的瞳仁中间,她用哭得红红的眼睛看着煜诚。她的眼睛好像比以前更凹陷了。没有化妆的脸上,斑斑点点看得分明,头顶也失去了光泽。微风把她的短发吹得东倒西歪。但在现实世界里,承美的眼中含着淡淡的泪光,脸上却带着隐隐的笑容,犹豫了片刻,她终于鼓起勇气用和朋友说话的轻松语气对煜诚说道。

“郑代理,我一直想说很抱歉,谢谢你。”

曾经煜诚最渴望的就是看到妻子向自己低头的样子,隔着两个世界,漫长的时间,这一目的终于达成了,却并不像煜诚想象的那么畅快满足。他只是想证明就算自己有错,妻子并非没有半点错误。直到离婚变成了意料之中的事情,他最初真正想要的就是一个男人羞耻的自尊心。

“什么?”

煜诚问道,他的脸抽搐得扭曲了,心就像在柏油路上被剐蹭一样痛苦。

承美好像感觉这样的自己无语极了,笑出声音,然后两眼饱含着璀璨的泪光,咬着嘴唇。

“因为我…我对你…真的是那样。”

煜诚带着疲惫的表情听承美把埋藏在心底的话说完,然后魂不守舍的向门口走去。承美把手放在门把手上,难过得蹲了下来,但却没有眼泪。说出了被禁止的话并没有感到自由,待清醒过来后,承美开始越来越害怕,不知道怎样面对无法靠近却又近在咫尺的郑煜诚。

午休时分,乌云迅速聚集,四周变得昏暗起来,风刮得越来越大。就像对于不同的人来说时间流逝的方式不同那样,心情愉悦的明曜与咖啡搭档和心怀鬼胎的申正焕孙美玉夫妇,以及表情凝重的煜诚承美,他们感受时间流逝的方式就不一样。一道闪电划过,紧接着传来了滚滚雷声。

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