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林一铭走过来将她的手拉下来,“我告诉你,当时我什么也没有想,就那么跳下去了,身体往下坠的感觉很美妙,是不是需要我再给你示范一次。”他的手指掐进了她的手腕。

“你别说了好不好,是我错了,你别说了!”乔嫣用力地摇着头,她的泪掉在了林一铭的手背上。

“你错哪了?是我这个研究对象还不够深刻具体吗?是我对你展现得还不够吗,怎么能是你错了?这应该是我错了。”林一铭慢慢地放下手,他揉着刺痛着的额头,无力地靠在桌子上,“别再做没有意义的事,你难道没听说有人研究抑郁症反倒自己也得了抑郁症吗?别让我把病传染给你。”他拿起那本书用手几下撕碎,“没有人比我更了解自己,你的观察日记并不全面,我可以给你提供一份更为完整的。”他自嘲地笑着。

“林主任……”乔嫣感觉自己的心也和这一地的纸碎掉了。

“以后别对我这么客气,你完全可以称呼我抑郁症一号、狂躁症一号。”他看着一地的碎纸苦笑着,“我现在就是狂躁症发作吧?”

“我从来没有那么想过你。”乔嫣伸出手想去触碰他苍白的脸。

“别碰我”林一铭甩掉她伸过来的手,他在竭力想让自己冷静下来,可却怎么也不能够,离开这里就好了,可他怕走出去自己的这副血脉贲张的神情会吓到别人,冷静!他坐下来对自己说,可神经全部都像被火灼烤一般,听到有消防车的声响传来,他竟然以为那是来扑他身上的火,再仔细听,却又好像没有了,这时桌子上手机的铃声像拯救他一般刺耳的响了起来,“空海,嗯,我知道了。”接完同学陆空海的电话,他感觉神经稍稍舒缓了一点,站起来准备离开。

“你去哪?”乔嫣扯住他的袖子,让他这样的状态离开,她真的不放心。

“别管我!”林一铭用力甩开她的手,他不能去看她含满泪水的眼,那眼泪是毒药,落在身上会蚀心化骨,那眼泪是她的伪善,让他软弱也让他坚强,“别跟着我!”他嫌恶地回头瞪着跟身后的她。

“外边有朋友在等我。”乔嫣擦干眼泪解释着。

“那你先走。”林一铭站下来,看着她垂头从他身边走过去,无力得像是那纤细的腰身也要折断了,他眼眶发酸,忙抬头看向天空,天空很蓝,没有一片云朵路过。

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