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十多年没有听到这个称呼,一怔,眼睛里顿起说不清、道不明的暗涌。不过是昙花一现,饶是古灵观察敏锐,也捕捉不到什么。

浅浅勾唇,坐到她旁边,问道:“结果怎么样?”

古灵歪着脑袋,朝他一笑:“还在等。”

抓住她的手,他搁在腿上,揉搓捏压:“你在紧张?”

“里昂哥哥。”她知道这个旧称可以影响他,依旧诚挚地喊道,“我怀孕了,我要彻底开始新生活了,你会放过我的,对吗?”

把她的手移到唇前,他轻轻印吻,停了近一分钟。

短短的一分钟,她不敢呼吸,浑身紧绷,脑海里浮现了很多以前的片段。他们,相依为命的片段。

他到底松开了她的手:“我陪你等。”

古灵应道:“好。”

静静坐着,她看着面前的病人、家属来来往往,却只想再弯过头,看看。她怕他出现,在他出现时,又有莫名的情谊让她舍不得。

不是爱情,是舍不得那种依附共生的时代结束。他已经不需要她了,他可能今天来,还是要逼她呢。

脑子里飘过种种想法,她顺由心声,歪着脑袋,靠在他的肩膀上。他没有反抗,她闭上眼睛:“里昂哥哥,有一次我病了。我很担心你责怪我,我忍着病痛,那次我失败了。被那个人抓住,他谩骂我,推搡我,要把我送进监狱。你救了我,你打了他。你很生气,你气我,可你把我背在身上。那时候我也像现在一样,靠在你的肩膀上。那时候我意识不清了,但我相信,靠着你,一切都会好。”

抒情的,柔软的话语,但似乎激不起的情绪波动。

身后,握住她的肩膀:“现在呢?靠着我,什么感觉?”

古灵猛地睁眼,近距离和他对视。盈盈的眼里,水润极了,像是随时都能哭出来似的。她掩不住满脸的担心和哀求:“里昂哥哥,我想相信你。我曾经许诺一辈子为你所用,我也一直做到了。可现在,你遇到了周淼淼,我遇到了陈嘉禾,不是吗?我有孩子了,我没想过我有孩子……可是就是有了。我想要有个家,我不希望,我现在这个家,被我曾经最最最深爱的你给毁了。”

那种爱,并非是纯粹是爱情,而是互相照顾、陪伴的亲情。

“灵儿,你在求我吗?”看得见她眼角的泪,眉尾的痣。

“在求。”古灵坦诚。

“最后一件事。”表情松动。

古灵却很激动,站起,不顾公众场合,歇斯底里地吼:“没有最后一次了!没有了!”

瞬间又变得平静无澜,恰好古灵要去拿结果。

胎儿健康。

谈判失败,古灵把报告塞进包里,匆匆要走。

大步追上她:“你为什么没有耐心听我说完?”

古灵拉上包,健步如飞:“你为什么阴魂不散?”

“小心滑胎。”说话间,大手一揽,半抱起她,让她不能再跑。

“你不要对我孩子动手!”古灵尖声喊道。

人来人往,他觉得不好说话,抱着她走:“你最好安静。”

在他的眼神压迫下,她最终安静,双手圈住他的脖子,寻找依附。

“你刚刚变得太快,”边走边说,“这样会让我觉得,你并没有那么爱我,你在用往事乞求我对你手软。祈求挣扎在地狱的我,不要阻拦你步入天堂。”

“我……”古灵被他说得心堵住了。情都是真的,可怕也是真的。何况她真的,很在意孩子。她从小没人照顾,她相信,陈嘉禾绝对会是好爸爸,而她,也会用生命去照顾自己的孩子。

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